Depression

I am alone
Curled up in a ball
Hiding from it all
Does anyone see?
I think not.

I stare at the wall
It is blank--
and empty
I am the wall
All alone

I sit in darkness
Surrounded by the evil
of desolation
Still darker
I am blind

Is there a light?
It is so faint--
It flickers
and goes out
Will it return?
Will I let it?

Who am I?
Why am I?
Infinitely equal
A speck o dust
in a sandstorm.

I am lost
There are paths--
but too many
Falling deeper
into my own pit?

So confused
With no answers
Should I ignore
the questions?
But how?

I have so much
I have it all
I have nothing
No one does
If they do--
is it real?

Am I right?
What is wrong?
I do not know
just don't know.

I'm so sorry
Sorry for me
and for you
But those
are just words
All are words
in a book
Unreadable.

Mistakes
Can we erase
what seems
permanent?
Maybe it is.

Contradictions
Like understanding
and hope
But wait...
Is that the light?...

--T. DeMatio (1988)